Postby WildcatOne » Sat Mar 05, 2011 3:46 pm
Thanks, my friends. Billy, thank you for your post. Boyd, you and I have had identical experiences throughout our lives, my brother.
All this aside, there is a deeper, more serious problem I'm dealing with right now. It could be a phase I'm going through, but I am having a great deal of difficulty with my thought process. I could give a few dozen examples of how bad it's getting, but suffice it to say I am no longer anywhere near on top of my deal like I was a year ago. I can't put words together, I can't think things out, I can't seem to get a grip on the big picture anymore. It just doesn't show up. I'm blank most of the time. I'm making big mistakes. I'm losing track of what I'm doing.
I have a constant dull headache. It could be I just need new glasses. It could be I'm taking the wrong vitamins. It could be I need a bigger computer screen. It could be I'm not getting enough rest, but I'm forcing myself to get 8 hours of sleep a night now. It could be my diet (I'm dieting and have lost 4 pounds with a goal of 10 for 2011). It could be stress. It could be that I'm getting Alzheimer's disease. Whatever it is, I'm aware of it, big-time...I've always been big on detail and quality control and I QC myself all the time...lately I'm not making the grade; not even coming close.
I'm being careful. I'm handling my schedule fairly well but not like I used to. I made a committment to attend an after-funeral get-together with a longtime friend whose Dad died a week after mine did. He came to town for the ceremony. When the day came to meet up with him, I completely forgot the whole thing. It was less than a mile from where I work. When I got home that day my wife even asked me "Aren't you supposed to be at an art gallery right now, something to do with a funeral?" I looked straight at her and said "No. I have the night off." When I got an email from my friend 2 days later, I realized what I had done. That's the earliest example I can think of. That was in December.
Last night I was running my microphone cable across the stage, going behind the equipment with it so the mic cord wouldn't be running across where we walk. I didn't see the electrical box sticking out of the wall at head-level height and looking down, I whacked my head right into it while I was walking along stringing the cord behind the drum kit. It knocked me out on my feet. I stood there hanging onto the wall for a couple of minutes, seeing stars, completely wiped out. Then within a few seconds, everything came back...clear, sharp and in full...I was fine. It lasted until I got up this morning. Maybe I oughta get weekly head-whacks from electrical boxes.
This has put me into overdrive to write my book and make my albums...I want to make every word and every note count from now on. Maybe I should have kept my mouth shut about this, but as weird as it may seem, this is where the people I trust are. Thanks for being my friends. WC1
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