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Drag Racing Story of the Day!

Money, Money, Money... or Why Drag Racers
are Always Pulling Up Their Pants

By Bill Pitts

The immaculate Astro Magic Car restoration is what keeps sucking Bill Pitts' wallet out of his pants! Photo thanks to Bill Pitts
The immaculate Astro Magic Car restoration is what keeps sucking Bill Pitts' wallet out of his pants! Photo thanks to Bill Pitts

When you get the chance, open up the butterflies on the hat and, with a flashlight, if you'll look REAL CLOSE, on the inside lip... You'll see a row a TEETH.

I get out the dental floss every once in a while and clean out the little pieces of dollar bills that get stuck there. Seems like every time Morris and me start the car, I walk by the front of the hat and ssssssssssssssuck! The thing pulls the wallet right outta my back pocket. Darndest thing I ever saw. But THEN I started watchin' more closely as I walked around the pits and sure enough -- IT'S HAPPENIN' TO EVERYBODY!!!!!!!!

Another shot of the amazing Astro Magic Car. Come see it at the CHRR on October 5-8, 2000. Photo thanks to Bill Pitts
Another shot of the amazing Astro Magic Car. Come see it at the CHRR on October 5-8, 2000. Photo thanks to Bill Pitts

Used ta think it was just some kinda affliction common to all drag racers, 'cause ever' body that's doin' it has a FLAT BUTT ('cept Laurie Watts, a course). I pointed that out ta Morris, and he said: THEY DON'T HAVE FLAT BUTTS, YOU IDIOT! THEY'RE JUST MISSIN' THEIR WALLETS!!

"Oh," I said, "So THAT'S why Kalitta's always pullin' up his pants."

It's a fact...

Pitts

 

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