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Posted: Mon Aug 14, 2006 7:58 pm
by draglist
Fantastic!!! Great job, Cat. You did your dad proud. bp
Posted: Mon Aug 14, 2006 7:59 pm
by jim sanders

good news Cat !!
Posted: Tue Aug 15, 2006 8:49 am
by pro70z28
Good Job WC. And good for your Dad, That had to be a tough decision, but he made the right choice.
Posted: Tue Aug 15, 2006 7:28 pm
by Novel-T
John,we have talked about our relationships with our fathers.Reading this has been very emotional for me.I know the dread you must have felt about confronting your father.I'm proud of you!Although my father and I never resolved our differences.I truly wish this has started a new relationship with your Dad
Posted: Tue Aug 15, 2006 8:49 pm
by WildcatOne
Thanks, guys, and T, yes, I thought about you and our conversation about our relationships with our fathers. On the way to Des Moines from Oscaloosa, folks, T and I discovered that we had very similar upbringings and very similar, very strained relationships with our fathers growing up. He knows how hard this was for me to sack up and do. It was like standing up to a bully and being ready to take the punches. My Dad has had an attitude with me all my life and I have never once been able to get the upper hand with him...I gave up on believing that he would some day treat me as an equal and talk to me with respect. It's a very long and deep-rooted story that goes back to when he was 3 years old and his father died. He was then raised by my Grandmother's brother, Uncle Henry, who as it turned out was a predator and a hateful and cold man who didn't want to be there and treated the kids that way. My Dad pretty much grew up with Uncle Henry's personality. He gave us a privileged life, we never wanted for anything, but I always had a deep feeling of "Why doesn't my Dad like me?"...it lingers to this day...like I say, he didn't have an easy go of it, and he never had a father's love. I learned a lot from him about how NOT to treat my kids. They hang out with me and don't feel intimidated by being around me and saying exactly what they're thinking. This event was a major life-shock and change for my Dad, and it had to be me who confronted him. I did not ask him anything; I ordered him with honor and I made him comply with what I was saying. I let him know right off the top that the structure of our previous relationship had ended and this new one was beginning...he completely agreed and he thanked me. I made him see the error and the danger in what he was doing and I let him know that it was unacceptable. This begins the final chapter of his life, and he was instinctively reluctant to open it, but it was past time. This chapter is just beginning. They still live independently in the beautiful house in Galveston. Both of them are falling all the time. Muriel has broken her nose and split her head open, so has he. Any day now, one of them is going to fall and break a hip, and that will be the end of it for them there. They will have to move into an assisted living environment. They are putting it off as long as they can, and I am OK with that, but I know it's coming, sooner than I want it to. I'll be honest and tell you that I hope I don't live near that long. I don't want to go through what they're going through, but they both wanted to live long and I'm glad they are doing that, it's just not my idea of a good life for me. Once my kids grow up, and I have my affairs in order, fine. I've had time to think about stuff like this. Guess I'll shut up. WC1
Posted: Tue Aug 15, 2006 9:47 pm
by pro70z28
It's a tough thing gettin' old. I thought about that last night. I was up 'til 1am finishing a job that had to be ready by 6am this mornin'. I usta' work til' 1am every night for years. Now I avoid it whenever possible, but there are times.....like last night.....

Anyway...... I was thinking about how the day is coming when I won't be able to just do whatever I feel like doing. I thought about your Dad WC. After spending' a lifetime purdy much free to do what you want, to get older and lose that freedom must be tough. I'm glad he seems to be listening to your advise. IMHO it might be because he respects you more than he's willing to admit. Getting old is tough. Just got an email tonight that Mom may need eye surgery soon. Everything happens for a reason. Good thing we can't see too far into the future HUH?
Posted: Tue Aug 15, 2006 10:17 pm
by WildcatOne
I sure hope it goes well for your Mom, ProZ. Everything you said I took to heart. I've had to cut back on my musical schedule because I was getting so tired I couldn't see straight. Heck, it's 9:05PM here and I'm tired...but I know what you mean about being able to do anything you want for as long as you want and then you can't do that anymore...it's tough. My Dad has had a rough go of it the last few years, and he's having to adjust and it's been hard on him. But he has always had integrity and he taught me to be a gentleman and to be polite and this is what he is doing now with his predicament. I just want him to have it as easy as possible. I can't be there with him to guide him and help him, he won't let me. But I'm calling him and telling him what he can do and he appreciates that. I will be on call for him from now on.
Just got the call for 2 gigs with Pee Wee Bowen the next 2 Saturday nights. Good money gigs. No conflict with Shakedown's schedule. Life is good. I had an idea for a Citykings' flyer. We might get this gig. Hope so, it'll be Debby's 50th birthday party. Cheers, WC1

Posted: Wed Aug 16, 2006 12:44 am
by Barb
John, from what I've read and seen, this assisted living stuff isn't what it usta be. They have all the necessary needs for everyone but they are living in their own apartment like setting. It might just be something worth looking into.
Gary, I wish your mom nothing but the best. It's a shame she has to go through any additional pain and suffering with surgery.
Posted: Wed Aug 16, 2006 10:00 am
by WildcatOne
That's true, Barb. Thanks. They're going to stay in their house until they can't stay there anymore; that means until something happens to make them move. But there are some very nice places that are available to them. I'm keeping close tabs on them at this point. Good luck with your Mom, Gary. WC1
Posted: Wed Aug 16, 2006 12:27 pm
by pro70z28
Thanks Barb, WC.
Hope everything works out for you & your Dad WC.