Astro Pilots, Part I

**"Fuel Cars Are Like Dope"**

©2005 Bill Ott

*Mama always told me not to look
into the eyes of the sun,
But Mama....
That’s where the fun is*

We were gathered around the parking lot in small groups of friends and acquaintances when the thunder erupted from the darkness. And a beautiful thunder it was too. Thunder that seemed to overwhelm all of the senses. Thunder that draws you in with its violent threatening power. Thunder that shakes the very ground under your feet... hell, shakes the whole damn valley! Thunder that dominates the senses. Thunder that demands all of your attention.

And of course... compounding the thunder’s reverberations... the lightning.

Lightning that exploded in a devilish dance keeping time with the thunder. Lightning that flashed from all directions and no particular direction all at the same time... some flashes appearing to reach the skies... others disappearing in short bursts of blinding brightness. Lightning that casts an eerie radiance on the faces of the by now mesmerized followers.

And of course... there’s those drug like fumes. Once you inhale that stuff... you’re hooked. Ms. Muldowney once said... **"Fuel cars are like dope... they’re like drugs. Fuel cars are like the needle... OK? Once you taste it... it’s like a sickness. You can’t do without it."** And for most of us it’s that "do without it" thing that drew us here... that one last ‘hit’ before returning to our mundane nine to five life.

Some among us won’t get near another NITRO car until next year when they return to these parts. And that’s too long between ‘fixes’. But right now, it’s all rolled up right here in this intimidating yet tempting pyre we’re gathered around. Dare to step any closer? Surely some kind of harm must come. Dare step back? Surely this enticing assault on the senses will end.

And after a few short minutes... it does end. But not without leaving in its wake the cheers of the faithful, as well as the sounds of triggered car alarms and the occasional barking dog. And then there was the fly over by the California Highway Patrol helicopter. Seems someone reported hearing loud explosions in the area.

Ahh... but so goes the NITRO ‘cackle’ experience in the darkness... Bakersfield style.

We had all congregated in this small farming community just three short days ago to celebrate what has become by now THE nostalgia event of the Drag Racing season... the California Hot Rod Reunion. When things kicked off on Friday morning, Sunday night seemed like an eternity away. But here it was upon us already and those few of us stragglers that hadn’t yet left town for home and job... or even better... didn’t have to be at work first thing tomorrow morning... had arranged this secret rendezvous at this (as of then) undisclosed location near the edge of town.

On this particular occasion there were two featured ‘Cacklers’. The Anderson family with their beautifully restored ‘Vagabond" and Bill Pitts’ Winkel and Trapp ‘Astro Industries’ dragster. Both diggers were originally built by Kent Fuller... the ‘Astro’ dragster being one of Mr. Fullers experimental ‘MagiCars’. So named because of their lack of any discernable front suspension (the secret was in the chassis ‘flex’) and adjustable rear suspension. Yep... you heard me right... rear suspension. The rear axle could also be adjusted back and forth a few inches to change the wheelbase to adapt to differing track conditions. Word is, Fuller only built three of these babies. Chris ‘The Greek’ Karamesines wound up with one of ‘em.

But getting back to where we were... I’d bet there’s only one thing that could possibly beat huddling around these diggers from a bygone era as they ‘cackle’. That’d have to be sitting inside of one of ‘em as they do. That’s about as close as you’re going to get to the real thing. I think I would be safe in the assumption that piloting one down the quarter mile, hammer down, ain’t a viable option in this day and age.

But as for myself... I’d settle for just hopping into one and riding out a ‘cackle’ any day. Whoever was on board those two that evening, I can’t recall. But I know I considered them to be a whole lot luckier than me. You see, both crews have been known to tap a total stranger on the shoulder and ask if they wanted a ride. I once saw Bill Pitts walk up to a guy and tell him he’d always wanted a photograph of someone sitting in his dragster wearing a Tee Shirt like the one that guy had on... would he mind? WOULD HE MIND?!? Damn... wouldn’t have to ask me more than once!

But hey... I seem to have drifted off course again. The ‘cackle’ has ended... quiet has returned to the valley... those addictive fumes have drifted off somewhere (maybe way up in the Ozone to wreak just a little more havoc?)... the car alarms have all been disarmed... and most of the pooches have drifted back off to sleep.

Time to shake everyone’s hand... and maybe even give a couple of hugs here and there (you listening Jack?). Heading back to Vagabond Inn I find myself already thinking about next year... and the gathering of the faithful in these same spots. Yeah... I know it’s gonna be another run of unforgettable experiences. It always is.

More old B.S. later.
Badco

Forward advice, rebuttals, and death threats to badco@elp.rr.com

*©1973 "Blinded by the Light"
Words and Music by Bruce Springsteen
‘Springsteen Zomba Music Ltd.’
Performed by Manfred Mann’s Earth Band
From the 1977 Warner Brothers Release
‘The Roaring Silence’

Although originally recorded by Bruce Springsteen and the E Street Band in 1973 on their album "Greetings From Asbury Park, N.J." and released as a single, the later cover version by keyboardist Manfred (Michael Lubowitz) Mann’s Earth Band reached #1 on Billboard’s Top 40 Singles and stayed in the Top 40 for fifteen weeks. Springsteen’s version never made a dent... or even got noticed. But that would all change shortly.

** ©2000-01 "Fuel Cars Are Like Dope"

From the Nitronic Research Release
"The Big Sounds Of The Drags 2001"
Produced by Cole Coonce

A note of thanks to both the Pitts and Anderson crews... the people of Bakersfield... the folks at www.wediditforlove.com ... Cole Coonce... and Brudda Bruce Wheeler... Aloha

Thanks also to Soaps by Betty www.angelfire.com/wizard/soapsbybetty for their continued support.

THANKS BUD